Title: Bring Me Into the Light
AUTHOR: Mistress Ace & Em
E-MAIL: rosewood@inreach.com & winter@sapphire-dragon.net
FEEDBACK: Is the butter on our bread. We write because the story begs to be told. Feedback lets us know if we struck a chord with you.
DISTRIBUTION: Our site, for the moment. When we post fully edited chapters, those can be posted elsewhere. RATING: NC-17
CATEGORY: Story: Romance, Angst
SPOILERS: As You Were
PAIRINGS: B/R/Sam, m/f, f/f
DISCLAIMER: Don't own the characters at all. (More's the pity) They belong to the Great God Joss Whedon et al. We are just borrowing them for a little bit. That's all. No BtVS characters were harmed in the writing of this fic. Well, maybe just a little.
SUMMARY: Not back for long enough. Not nearly long enough and there were too many things left up in the air. But isn't that the purpose of fan-fiction?
 

Chapter 40

Sam drew back slowly, untangling herself from their legs and rising up. She sat back on her heels, wiping her chin. The smile on her face was brilliant, clearly satisfied with the results of their combined effort. Riley looked so content, so pleased with himself that Sam couldn't keep from laughing.

Buffy looked up at Sam with a raised eyebrow and a mildly curious expression. She didn't have the energy for a more usual expression of curiosity at her lover's amusement. "What's funny, Sammie?" she asked with a soft purr of pleasure underlying her voice.

"You two. Actually Riley... If you could see his face right now." Sam stroked his leg, then her leg, avoiding touching either of them in any intimate places. Her husband's smile did nothing but get broader.

Good, he felt so good he had no intentions of moving again. Not ever. Riley pulled Buffy in closer, nuzzling her neck and humming to himself. Off key as usual but he didn't care.

"Damn," Buffy muttered good-naturedly. "Wish I had a mirror. Don't feel like moving right now." She shook her head slightly and shrugged just barely. "It's okay, I'm sure I'll see it sometime. 'M just glad everyone's happy... but I'd be happier if you'd come here, please?" She lifted her arm, wanting Sam to curl up beside her again. Wanted to be close to them both for as long as she could be.

Sleepy, Buffy sounded sleepy and Sam couldn't blame her. After an orgasm like that anybody would be. Moving slowly, she crawled up the bed and settled down beside them. Riley rose up from behind Buffy, cupped the back of Sam's head and kissed her, licking at her lips.

Familiar taste of Buffy, sweet and musky. Mixed in a little with something really unpleasant. No wonder Sam made a face and needed something to drink. "Hey, anybody thirsty?" he murmured. Riley was pretty sure he had enough strength somewhere to get up and find them something to drink.

"Mmm... please. Want me to get it?" Even as she asked, Sam cuddled up with Buffy. Sighed when she felt the soft brush of Buffy's hair on her shoulder and a tiny, electric shock of a kiss in the hollow of her throat.

"No... I think I can manage." Pulling out wasn't going to be fun and walking probably close to impossible but he could do it. He would do it. In a minute... or twenty.

"I'd like a little too, please, when you go," Buffy added. Though she hadn't been entirely aware of it, she must have screamed her throat raw. It ached a little, though she knew it'd probably be fine in an hour or so. Though she figured she'd be asleep by then; she was so sleepy all of a sudden... warm and content and snuggled with her lovers. There couldn't possibly be a better place to fall asleep.

"Coming right up." Hand on her hip and he was pulling out, slowly. Riley bit his lower lip when he came free of her body, resisting the urge to shove right back in. He didn't want to leave her. God, he didn't want to leave her. Not when this might be the last time...

Under control, he had to get this under control. Riley didn't want Buffy to see him like this. To know that he might have any doubts about their mission and what lay ahead.

Sam caught the look on his face and understood it for what it was. Keeping her expression carefully schooled, she chose to occupy Buffy with a kiss while Riley rolled away from them and got to his feet. Mouth warm and soft, pliant under her own while she listened to her husband's footsteps and the bathroom door opening, then closing again.

Buffy nibbled gently on Sam's lower lip and returned her kiss. With a soft sigh she curled up against Sam and dismissed her questions from her mind. She thought something was up and wanted to ask, but she decided that would ruin the mood and she didn't want to go there again. She also thought about asking Sam about Riley and the demons he was apparently still fighting inside himself, but again decided that this wasn't the time or place.

Instead she just enjoyed the quiet attention Sam was giving her, and gave her attention and love back. It was a pleasant, comfortable kind of quiet. Something that had occurred only too rarely in Buffy's life.

For the rest of her life. Sam could do this for the rest of her life. Kiss Buffy, hold her in her arms and feel her strong heart beating against her own. When their path first brought them to Sunnydale, she'd been terrified of the prospect of meeting the legend, meeting the Slayer... as well as meeting the woman behind the sorrow in Riley's eyes.

So much had changed since that fateful night and all of it for the better. Riley's shadows were lighter, his heart was lighter... all because of this. Because of the woman in her arms.

He stood for a few moments, holding a glass of water in each hand and watching them kiss. Sam's reverent touches, work-roughened hands sliding through a halo of spun gold... the tender line of Buffy's throat, the curve of her cheek, the press of their bodies together. If asked for a definition of ethereal beauty, Riley would have chosen this. He was humbled by it. Too exquisite for the eyes of the common man and it was his to view for the rest of his life.

However long that would prove to be.

Buffy sighed softly. She'd found a small piece of Heaven again, in her lovers' arms, in the way they made her feel. In the way she felt about them. She could spend the rest of her life with them and have absolutely no complaints at all. Despite all the logical reasons that made joining the military and their unit a good idea, in her heart she was doing it in order to stay with them. With the people that made her life worth living.

No matter how much she tried to keep it to herself, Buffy knew that she was desperately afraid of what tomorrow would bring. She'd found her piece of Heaven again, but she might lose it again too. She could lose one of them, and losing one could mean losing the other. She knew that they loved her, but she didn't know if they loved her enough separately to return alone.

She had no idea how much of what they felt for her was tied into their triad. Sam especially... they had no prior emotions to bring them back together. And though Buffy knew she would follow them anywhere if she had to, she didn't know how much of that feeling was returned. It made tomorrow even harder.

And, as it turned out, there were yet more secrets. Something was up with Riley; something Sam didn't seem to know about either. That bothered them both, but Buffy didn't think tonight was a good time to push him about it... even though she might not ever have another chance...

After the longest time, Sam finally pulled back to look at Buffy. She smoothed back her lover's hair and smiled. "Are you just going to stand there watching us, Ry?" Her gaze flicked to her husband who lounged in the doorway, looking completely at ease and content with the world.

"It's a nice view," he commented, tone light and casual. No hint of his earlier distress, none at all. Pushing off from the wall, he closed the distance and sat down on the edge of the bed. Handed one glass to Sam and held the other for Buffy while she sat up, her back against the headboard. "I like watching you two together."

"Thanks," Buffy said to him quietly, both about his comment and for the water. She took the glass and drank deeply, the water soothing her dry, sore throat. "I can certainly understand, though," she added as she set the glass down, holding it between her knees while she shifted position slightly. "I like watching you two, too."

**Even if it does make me wonder how I can ever hope to catch up, let alone compare.** That particular thought was best left unsaid, but she still couldn't help thinking it.

Riley shifted until his back was against the headboard as well. He straightened the covers, pulling the sheet up to cover his lap and hissed when it came in contact with his thigh. That quiet sound was enough to catch Sam's attention. "Ry... let me see your leg."

"It's nothing. I'll heal." Off-handed response, probably too off-handed since Sam narrowed her eyes and twitched the sheet back. She winced at the sight of the deep red mark, the indentations of her teeth standing out in sharp relief. The skin was actually cut at one point.

Knowing he was busted, Riley leaned back further and spread his legs. Sam explored it gently, shaking her head. "Damn... I had no... Honey, I'm sorry."

"Sam... I've had worse. Much worse... all right?" The scars on his neck, the ones inside his elbow, high up on his right hip, behind his left knee stood as silent testament to the truth of that statement. Not that it held any water with his wife. She was already off of the bed, headed for the med-kit.

"Doesn't matter, Riley. Let her take care of it, please?" Buffy asked softly, pinning him with a look... one that spoke volumes of emotion, including determination, worry and guilt. "If she doesn't, I will. I know enough to do it. You'd insist if it were one of us, and you know it..." And he would. Of course he would. He'd always insisted on doctoring all but the most minor of hurts she took while on patrol.

This was equal to several of those, and worse than a number of them. Buffy had only ever been bitten twice: once she'd volunteered, once she'd been half-mesmerized.

"Not like I can really argue with either of you. Or that I want to." His laugh was soft, not the booming joyful sound from earlier. And the shadow was back as he rubbed absently at his hip, thumb stroking over the white bumps there. Unaware of the movement, completely unaware until Sam returned with her kit and fixed him with a look.

"Ry... is it getting bad again?" Quiet question, even as she unloaded the supplies. Alcohol swabs, gauze, surgical tape, bacterial soap. The human mouth wasn't the cleanest thing in the world, infection was a distinct possibility if the wound wasn't tended to right away.

The Finns looked at one another, holding eye contact for a very, very long time before Riley nodded. "Yeah, Sam. It is." Killing the nameless one last night triggered it. Nagging ache at the back of his mind, accentuated by rough sex and the bites he'd gotten from both Buffy and Sam. It would be so easy to fall right back into it again... despite everything he'd gained over the last year.

An addiction was an addiction. It never really went away. No matter how much you wanted it to go. And figuring out tonight that the whole thing had been just as much sexual as anything else was... unsettling.

Buffy frowned and shifted to the side until she could look at both of them. Other than the frown, her face was nearly expressionless... and Riley should know, even if Sam didn't, that that was a bad sign. "What's getting bad? What aren't you telling me?" Neither accusing nor judging, it was simply a question. But inwardly, Buffy was not happy.

It seemed Riley had an interesting double-standard... He wanted to totally share in all her hurts and problems, but he apparently didn't want to let her in on his. That hurt and, if it continued, could possibly drive her crazy.

"This," he said simply, rubbing his thumb over a line of scars on the inside of his left elbow. Riley met her level gaze with one of his own. "We studied it in Walsh's class, Buffy. Fourth week, chapter 5 - psychological effects of addiction. I... go through cycles."

Might as well give it all to her. Buffy spilled her guts last night and tonight, he owed her the same honesty in return. "Sometimes I'm good... no problem at all. And sometimes it gets to me. The last vamp I dusted, the one with the mouth on him... we had a history. Buffy... Christ, how do I tell you this?"

"Try straight up. It's what you're best at, Finn." While not cold, Sam's voice wasn't warm either. She wet a fold of gauze with the soap and scrubbed at the bitemark. Didn't even flinch when he hissed in pain. Doctor first and foremost. "Gotta admit, I'm curious about that too."

"I don't know how you do it, but Sam's idea sounds best," Buffy agreed gently. "If you're anything at all like me, you need to tell someone before it kills you. Literally, in my case. I won't lie to you, either of you; I was dying before you showed up. I don't want that to happen to you, but we can't do anything if you won't talk about it."

She paused for thought, then sighed. "You were probably right the first time, Riley. The only way for a relationship like this to work is for all of us to be honest with each other. Now you're in my place, only you know it. So where do we go now?" Again, there was no judgment in her voice. Just simple facts, with a trace of sympathy. She knew firsthand that it was never easy. But only he could decide if he was going to share or keep secrets. If he would repeat the past or not.

"To the truth." He spread his legs a little more to accommodate Sam's work. "It goes back a long way, Buff. Back to when the Initiative went down. I was lost... cut adrift and the only thing I really had was you." Another swipe, this time with alcohol and Riley's jaw tensed and then relaxed.

"I kept in touch with a few of the guys, the ones that didn't stay in. And I had a few regular buddies I went out for beers with once in awhile but... You and Dawn and your mom were pretty much my family here. Willow and Xander didn't let me get too close. Guess they thought I took up too much of your time." Riley scrubbed a hand through his hair, staring at a spot past Sam's shoulder as she continued to dress his wound.

"Then you started getting distant and Giles blew right through my plans and it all fell apart. So close... I was so close to getting what I wanted but I couldn't quite reach it. You were right there, right in front of me and no matter how hard I tried to touch you... I kept falling short."

Sam's hands trembled a little, she fumbled one of the pieces of tape and had to start over. Some of this she knew and some of it was completely new. It was good that Riley was letting it out.

"Funny enough, it was Spike who hit me with the home truth. That I was the lucky guy... the one that got to hold you, got to feel you beneath me, moving with me. And still didn't have you." Riley caught the tiny sound of distress that Buffy made and turned his head to look at her.

He gave her the saddest smile she'd ever seen, smiled and shrugged. "This is my crap, Buffy. It's not yours and it's not your fault. Understood?"

Buffy raised and eyebrow and shook her head slowly, sadly. "The same way that what happened here after you left wasn't your fault? I know it isn't, but I doubt you believe that."

She bit her lip and sighed. "It is partly my fault, because I was there and didn't see it. Didn't know. I might be good at keeping secrets, but so are you... I never even guessed, and then I got too busy trying to save the world again. But that shouldn't be an excuse, really. I should have known something was wrong. And I should've taken the time to do something about it... before it was too late."

"Your mom was sick. Your mom. And I was... fuck..." Riley hated himself for this, deep-down hated himself. Couldn't see past his own two feet, past his own needs and if that wasn't passive-aggressive behavior, then he didn't learn anything from Intro Psych. "I didn't sleep with any of them, Buffy. Not one of them but I might as well have. Getting bit..."

This was harder on Riley than she thought it would be and Sam couldn't watch him suffer like this. She knew a little bit about vampire addiction, studied up on it when he told her about his problem. "Getting bit got you off. That's how it works, Ry. It's not just you... not you at all. That's why the vamp houses do such a booming business."

Buffy agreed with Sam, and said so. "She's right. It happens to almost everyone. At least, it does when the person is willing, I think." Buffy bit her lip, then steeled herself and looked into Riley's eyes. "It didn't happen when I was bitten by Dracula, though. I promise you. I didn't let that happen, it was done to me. I think that might be the difference. But the hormones involved with biting and being bitten... that's just kind of how it works."

The guilt eased a little, the weight lifting from around his heart as his gaze shifted from Buffy to Sam and back again. "I know the thing with Dracula wasn't your choice. And with Angel, you did it to save his life. Which, considering what you've told me about his work in L.A. and what our operatives there know, was a good thing. He's done a lot down there, saved a lot of lives. Just wish I could stand the guy."

Riley held his hand up before Buffy could protest, not that he was sure she would but it was time she heard him out on the subject of Angel. "Buffy, I know you loved him and he loved you. And Slayers have short, brutal lives... not a lot of time for romance. But he's what, 250? And you were 17... seventeen. If you'd been my daughter, I would've met the guy at the door with a shotgun."

Easing up, the darkness in his voice and his eyes was easing up. And he was lecturing which meant he felt better. Sam hid a smile as she put her supplies away. Just like Riley, he was an optimist and didn't stay down for long.

Buffy shook her head, amusement lighting her eyes. "Which would have done absolutely no good at all whatsoever. And after which, I would never have spoken to you again."

She sighed, and shook her head. "I never asked you to like him, Riley. But he kept me alive long enough to get to college. And besides, by the time I knew how old he was, I was already in love with him. My mom didn't like him either, you know. Did you ever hear her on the subject? Which always struck me as odd, because she liked Spike. Even pre-chip, she liked him."

"Your mom liked Spike? Oh man... now that's an image I didn't need." Now that Sam was done, Riley pulled the covers up again. He leaned forward and kissed her, soft and lingering for a moment. "Thank you, honey."

"You're welcome, Ry. Don't mind patching you up at all." Sam set the kit on the floor next to the bed. She stretched out at the foot, lying on her side and watching both of them. Stroked Buffy's leg gently, noting how she was lost in thought for a moment.

Buffy paused, thinking about what she needed to say. "Riley, the only people who liked the idea of me and Angel were me, Angel, and Willow. Giles didn't like it. Xander hates him, too. I suppose Oz never said a word either way, though probably being a werewolf gave him a basis for understanding. I am a supernatural creature, Riley, and I gravitate towards strength. It's part of what attracts me to you, and to Sam. Like seeks like, and Angel was the closest I could get at the time."

"I get that about you. Strength... have plenty of that. Seems some of the stuff Maggie did was permanent. Once I got over the heart problem and stopped... getting bitten, a lot of it came back. Not all of the speed but the strength's pretty much there and I heal really quick." Self-consciously, he touched the scar over his eye and chuckled. "This'll be gone in probably another year and I'll lose the only thing that makes my face interesting."

"Oh, I certainly wouldn't say that..." Buffy's eyes glinted briefly, but she sobered again as she returned to the topic at hand. "I know, I do it too. Walsh was messing with things she didn't understand. I wouldn't be surprised to learn that some of your enhancements have their origins in the demons she was studying. According to Dracula - though I'm not sure I believe him - the Slayer is the same way."

"Supernatural because of origins in the very creatures we fight. He kept trying to get me to give in to the darkness. My Slayerness - or whatever - was activated via means that I don't know. But your 'enhancements' could have been activated when you first came into contact with the vampiric variety of hormones." Buffy was guessing at some of what she was saying, of course, but it made only too much sense to her. And she wasn't saying that her theory was true, just that it wouldn't surprise her in the least.

"A lot of Maggie's research was lost but I wouldn't be surprised. Seems I was her prize guinea pig, the one she did the most to. No one else had chips." Riley mulled everything over that Buffy had just said, sitting still and silent for so long that Sam reached out to touch his foot and got a slow smile in return. "And yeah... None of the other guys have been bitten by vamps. Which might be why none of them are like me."

Sam caught the gleam in his eye and shook her head. There was subtle humor in her tone as she commented, "Don't even think it, Ry. Graham'll do a lot of things for you but he's gonna draw the line at that."

Buffy laughed at that. Sam was definitely right. "No kidding. Even if we could guarantee that he wouldn't be killed, Graham would never do it. Besides, I wouldn't run the risk of getting your guys addicted to it by chance. It's really a hard thing to break, I would guess." She let it go at that... if he wanted to tell her about his struggles with it, he could. If not, she would never ask.

She'd never been subjected to it herself, for whatever reason. Perhaps the one good thing from the entire set of incidents.

Riley sobered up instantly, finding the mark on his neck with his fingertips and shuddering. "It was... the hardest thing I've ever done. First few weeks, Graham bunked with me. Dogged my every step. Cuffed me to the cot on more than one occasion when I went nuts." Dark times, those were dark times and they only got worse. "I was certifiable. When we weren't in the bush, I was drinking... and yeah, I did anything to ease the itch. Really lucky I didn't catch anything fatal."

Sam wasn't surprised. She'd heard rumors about Riley's behavior. In fact, Drummond pulled her aside when she'd first gotten involved with him. Warned her that while Riley was the best XO he'd ever had, the guy wasn't known for being faithful or even particular.

Buffy very carefully kept her reaction to herself. She'd never guessed that Riley would turn to something like that... but she'd never imagined that he'd willingly let vamps bite him, not until it was shoved in her face. But she could not hold it against him for a lot of reasons... mostly because what he did after he left her wasn't any of her business. He'd been a free man, and if that's what it took to get him to where he was... well, it was akin to her thing with Spike. Which he didn't hold against her. So they were pretty even on that score.

"I'm glad you didn't, either. Though if your enhanced qualities are anything like mine, an enhanced immune system would be one of them..." As she mentally compared their abilities, Buffy wondered if Walsh had secretly been attempting to create her own version of a Slayer as well as tampering with demonic crossbreeds.

"Yeah. Guess Maggie did me some good, after all." Riley scrubbed his hands through his hair, barely able to stay in the same bed with them. There was so much of that time he'd repressed, that he'd lost in a drunken haze but it was all coming back to him now. "I thought I hit rock bottom the night you caught me. Not even close. I'm not proud of what I did. It wasn't pretty and it wasn't fun and I'm glad I'm out of it."

He didn't belong here, didn't belong with two good women who loved him. Yes... he'd broken up with Buffy and was technically a free agent then and he hadn't met Sam but that still didn't make it any better. He didn't deserve them, not after that.

Buffy was watching Riley carefully, and when she noticed that he couldn't look at either her or Sam, she thought she knew why. Rising to her knees, she moved across the bed and straddled his lap, sitting on him so he couldn't move away. She cupped his chin and lifted his face until his eyes met hers; once she had his gaze caught, she refused to let it go. She studied him for a moment and caught a reflection of what had been in her own eyes for so many months.

She kissed him gently and whispered, "Hush, love. You shouldn't think like that. You don't blame me for the whole mess with Spike, do you?" Buffy waited for him to shake his head, but she already knew the answer. She merely wanted him to confirm it. When he did, she continued, "Then you should know that we don't hold any of what you did against you. We're only human, Riley, and we make mistakes. Forgive yourself... we already have."

Buffy knew it wasn't that easy. She still hadn't really forgiven herself for falling in with Spike like she had. But it had happened, and she had to deal. And, knowing exactly how it felt, she would do everything she could to help Riley deal, too.

Sam was behind him now, rubbing his shoulders and watching with the same intensity as Buffy. "Ry, I know all about this. It's no secret. Why did you think I asked you about hating women? Graham told me when I first started showing an interest in you and Drum dragged me off right after Singapore." She leaned forward, kissed the knot of muscle at the top of his jaw. The one that always stood out whenever he was upset. "Didn't stop me... Didn't even slow me down."

"I don't... I don't deserve either of you." Riley sighed, wrapping his arms around Buffy and leaning back into Sam's embrace. "Most of it's a blur and the rest... I really don't want to remember. I damn near broke Graham's jaw during a fight and... two months before you and I met, Sam... I sat for about three hours with my sidearm in my mouth. Just couldn't bring myself to pull the trigger."

"There have been dozens of times in the past several months where I've very nearly just let the demon of the week kill me. I didn't care that it would be stupid for me, who's supposedly one of the best slayers ever, to be killed by some dumb little demon. The only thing that stopped me was Dawn... and even that was starting to slip," Buffy admitted very softly.

She hadn't told anyone about that until now, but Riley needed to know that he wasn't alone in his feelings. "I understand how you felt, and I can tell you that you're not the only one who's felt that way."

"I don't want to go there again." Simple words for such a complex horror. His arms tightened around Buffy and Sam's arms tightened around him. Riley wasn't sure which one of them started rocking but it felt good. Simple comfort. Soft, warm body behind him and another soft, warm body in front. Each of them holding onto him, giving him the lifeline he needed to stay on this side of sanity.

The ache in his throat might have been the residual of the addiction and it might have been tears. Riley wasn't sure which. He could feel the itch lessening, could feel sting easing... felt the need pass away as though it had never returned. "I'm not going to go there again. Not ever."

"We won't let you. We're not letting you go. Is that clear?" Sam's voice was muffled against his back. Muffled and strained and strange... much like his was. He could feel something warm and wet on his shoulder-blade. Heard her sniffle and nodded, confirming his understanding of her order.

Tears began to seep out of Buffy's eyes as well, but her voice stayed calm. "No... you're not, and neither am I. Never, ever again." Noticing that her voice still sounded normal, she decided that she had far too much practice controlling and hiding her own emotions. She did it without thinking, sometimes. But instead of going into it, she just leaned tighter against Riley. Rested her head on his shoulder and moved one arm to include Sam in her embrace.

The slow, steady rocking continued. He kissed the top of Buffy's head, closed his eyes and just let it go. Didn't need the bite, didn't need the oblivion and ecstasy that came along with it. Not when he had this. Buffy and Sam would keep him strong, keep him on the right path. They'd save him from himself... just like he would do the same for them.

It was no longer a case of Riley Finn vs. the world. It was them, all of them... all three of them pitted against whatever life decided to throw in their path. Riley knew Sam was up to the challenge and Buffy... Buffy was damn close.

For her own part, Buffy wasn't sure if she was entirely up to the challenge that life was presenting her. She knew that she needed to be strong for Riley... and for all of them, when they had to leave. She'd read somewhere that when your lover has no choice but to leave for a while, you should get all your tears out ahead of time so that you can smile for them when they leave. She wasn't sure how true it was, but she was going to try.

In her head was the thought that being strong for others was always so much easier than being strong for herself. It was almost instinct, to protect and be strong for the people she cared about. Much more than trying to do it for herself. Maybe if she kept telling herself that it was for them... maybe then, she could do it.

It was Sam who moved away first, sliding out from behind him and urging Riley to lie down with a silent hand on his shoulder. Buffy stayed, her arms wrapped around his neck as Riley eased himself down into the bed. She didn't want to let go of him and he didn't want to let go of her. That would happen soon enough...

Instead of disentangling himself from her embrace, Riley rolled until they were side-by-side. And sighed in relief when Sam molded herself to his back again. Riley could easily sleep like this, very easily. Morning was going to come far to early and while his heart and his body wanted something else entirely, his mind was preaching sensibility and caution.

They'd talked through another crisis. One of his own this time and miracle of miracles, the world hadn't come to an end. He'd opened up to Buffy and to Sam, let them see his weakness and neither of them had deserted him. Nor were they going to.

Putting other thoughts out of her mind, Buffy tried to make herself relax. She began to hum softly in Riley's ear, still trying to help him relax. He and Sam needed to sleep tonight before their mission, and she would do her best to see to it that they got it. Buffy knew that she wasn't going to sleep much, herself... but she'd lie there and pretend if that was what it took.

The soft humming led to his seeking out the source and kissing her. Gently at first, seeking comfort. But a moment or two later, Riley deepened the kiss, turning his head so that Buffy's mouth opened and let him inside. Her fingers slid up the nape of his neck and into his hair.

Sam pressed closer, watching over Riley's shoulder as he kissed Buffy. As much as he enjoyed the sight of them kissing, she felt the same way whenever he kissed Buffy. So much strength, lying coiled beneath the surface and yet they were gentle with one another. One kiss blending into another and another as Riley's hand cupped her shoulder, trailed down her side and finally came to rest on her hip.

As she kissed Riley, Buffy's hand began to drift as well. Slowly, gently she reached out until her fingers found Sam's hair. Followed the strands up to her face and then down her cheek. Small fingers found Sam's lips and brushed over them, back and forth in a gentle caress. Despite her determination to be strong, Buffy couldn't help her need to touch. To feel them both, while they were still here...

In response, Sam captured Buffy's hand in hers and brought the palm to her lips. She placed a warm kiss there, tracing the broken lifeline with the tip of her tongue. While she knew they had an early start tomorrow, there was no way she was calling a halt to this. Riley needed Buffy, Buffy needed Riley and Sam needed both of them. Even if it took all night.

They could sleep in the transport. It wouldn't be the first time... and probably wouldn't be the last.

*****

 
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